Alright Jeffy. Open up your present.
One present, Daddy?
Yeah. You only got one.
WHY?!!?
Uh... uh.. I don't know. That's all Santa brought.
Well, it better be something good.
ELEPHANT POOP?! I WANTED THIS LAST YEAR!!!
Jeffy, that's not elephant poop. That's coal.
And you got coal because you're a bad boy.
You said Jeffy's a BAD BOY?!
Yeah, Jeffy. You're a bad boy all year long, so Santa got you coal.
Because you got our videos age-restricted! (Jeffy is angry)
EEEEEEEEEE
UUUUUU
AAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(rip christmas tree)
TAKE THAT, SANTA CLAUS!
JEFFY! YOU THREW THE CHRISTMAS TREE, JEFFY?!
YEAH! BECAUSE SANTA CLAUS GAVE ME ELEPHANT POOP!!
Jeffy you didn't get toys because you were bad! And bad kids don't get toys for Christmas, Jeffy!
EEEEEEE
AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
huhhhh
Oooh Fo Mario!
Happy Free Stuff day!
Where my presents at?
Oh yeah, I did get you a present, Black Yoshi.
Uh, hold on. Let me get it.
Merry Christmas, Black Yoshi.
Ooh, what'cha get me?
I hope it's money!
Let me see.
Purpuliss Kool-Aid?!? Oh you know me all too well, FO!
Yeah, I know. I got you Kool-Aid. I always get...
Package came for you, fo!
What? A package came? For me?
Mhmmm!
It's from YouTube?
Where'd you get this?
Oh, I stole it off a front doorstep.
See, I was going around stealing packages off people's front doors...
and I stole this one from my house.(How can you steal from your own house?)
Uhh w.. w... But it's from YouTube?
What would YouTube want to send us?(a demonetization strike)
I don't know.
Let me see.
This present has been age-restricted
Yeah, yeah. That's what they've been doing to us.
Well anyway, Merry Christmas, Black Yoshi.
Merry Christmas.
Woah! Look at all this stuff I got for Christmas!
This is the best Christmas ever!
AGH!! STUPID SANTA CLAUS!!!!
Wha-- Jeffy what's wrong?
I didn't get anything for CHRISTMAS!!
Wha-- you didn't get anything for Christmas?
Well, I got elephant poop!
Wha-- Elephant poop?
Yeah.
Well, Santa gave me all this cool stuff.
Look, he gave me this robot.
And he gave me a Thomas the Dank engine.
He's so dank!
You got all this stuff for Christmas from Santa Claus?!?
Yeah, from Santa Claus.
*the sound of constipation*
DADDY!!!!
DADDY!!!!!!
What's wrong Jeffy?
WHY DID JUNIOR GET PRESENTS FROM SANTA CLAUS,
AND I ONLY GOT ELEPHANT POOP?!
Well, because Jeffy I already explained this to you.
You were bad all year long, (but Juniors a huge brat)
and Santa Claus doesn't give toys to kids that were bad.
Oh! How did he know I was bad Daddy?!
Because Jeffy, Santa Claus is always watching you.(stalker)
He always knows if you were bad or not,
and you were bad all year long,
so he didn't give you any toys.
So Santa Claus is watching right now?
Yep, Santa Claus is watching you right now.
Well I gotta message for Santa Claus!
HEY SANTA CLAUS!!
F*** U!!!
Wha--?
N!!!
That spells F-U-N!
And I'm not having F-U-N right now,
BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T GIVE ME ANY NEW TOYS TO PLAY WITH!
Well, Jeffy, you're being bad right now and he's not listening to you.(but he's always watching and listening)
Well how do I get toys right now, Daddy?!
Well Jeffy If I got Santa Claus to come visit you right now,
would you apologize to him,
and promise you'd be good forever? (Jeffy's mind: No, but I'll suck up for now)
Yeah.
Wha-- you would?
nuh-uh!
So if I get Santa Claus you will apologize to him?
UHH
HUHHH!!
Alright Jeffy, let me go get Santa Claus!
But you gotta be on your best behavior,
and you gotta apologize
and promise you will always be good.
Ok Daddy.
Alright Jeffy Santa Claus will be here any second now.
Ok Daddy.
Wha--? What's that sound Jeffy?
Wha--
Could it be?
I think it's--
Santa Claus!
Ho Ho Ho!(You only need one ho, not 3. 1 is enough)
And i'm not talking about my ex wife!(ooh, get roasted)
SANTA CLAUS?!!
Yep that's me, I'm Santa.(how many jobs does this guy have)
And I brought Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer!
People used to laugh and call him names,
and they still do.
You red nosed freak!
Alright Jeffy-- Clown!
Oh yeah I'm sorry, I'm done.
Alright Jeffy you-- Ugly!
We get it!
Alright Jeffy, what were you going to say to Santa Claus?
Hey Mr. Santa Claus, F U--
Woah! --N!
Oh it spells fun.
Yeah, and I'm not having fun this year,
because you didn't bring me any new toys!
Well, you've been a really bad boy this year!
You've been yelling, and cussing, and breaking stuff,
and kids like that don't get toys.
Yeah Jeffy, he's been watching you all year.
Yeah, I've been watching all the kids.
Just millions of kids.(pedophile)
24/7, 365.(pedophile)
Watching all the kids.(pedophile)
I see everything they do...(pedophile)
I should be investigated.
I have a problem.
I have a problem making all these toys!
For all the kids.
Is what I meant to say.
But, it's kind of messed up if you think about it,
like I got thousands of midgets working for me,(racist)
for no pay to make toys,(racist)
and then I break into peoples houses to deliver those toys,(intruder)
and then I fly in my sleigh,(runaway)
over no fly zones,(asshole)
and just to go back home so I can watch more kids. (that seems fun)
Well Mr. Santa Claus,
I'm sorry, and I promise to be good.
Give me toys.
Well, I'm sorry but
I'm sorry you are so ugly.(racist)
Is that glitter on your nose?(DON'T REVEAL YOUR TRICK)
Yes.
What, did you even try on your costume?
What is this, did you shave your stomach?
Did you get spayed?
It's homemade I made it last night.
Hey, how about we focus on this?
You didn't get any toys this year, because you were bad.
You have to wait until next year.
NEXT YEAR?!?!?!
TAKE THIS SANTA CLAUS!!!!
THAT'S NOT THE REAL SANTA CLAUS!!!(liar)
He's right! I'm a fraud!
Brooklyn Guy: BOO HOO!
And this is not a Rudolf either...
It's my co-worker, Jerry.
Jeffy: Where's the real santa, Daddy?
Mario: The Real Santa Claus Jeffy, he's in uh..North Carolina.
North Carolina? Don't you mean the North Pole?(No, he needs a winter home to survive through the snow that he already goes through 24/7/365)
Oh yeah the North... The North Pole. -Yeah, yeah. Santa Claus likes to go to North (racist)
Carolina on weekends we can look at lighthouses at Cape Hatteras oh you
he's at the stripper pole Jeffy
I-I couldn't get him he was really busy so
I got this Santa Claus
so... yea
well i'm gonna find the real Santa Claus
well jeff- *huff*
Mario: Well..Thank so for trying
Bowser Jr: So cody he shoots rockets and missiles and he also can blow up an entire planet(why would he?)
He can do all that stuff
Santa Claus give him to me. He's pretty cool
Junior, I need you’re help!!!
Wait... what’s wrong!
I need to go to North Carolina.(Finally, a break from that cunt)
Why
To see Santa Claus
Did you mean the North Pole
Why do you want to see Santa’s anyway?
Because he didn't give me no toys for Christmas,(double negative)
and I gotta ask him why.
Well, Cody can you take us to North Pole
With you’re machines
No junior there’s no way
Do you think you can bring Santa’s claus to us
Like a teleportion machine
hmmm, I might have something for that, hold on
Really
Just get the old ukelele
ukulele can open up portals in space and time just with music what really yeah so
if we play a catchy enough jingle maybe we can bring Santa here oh let's give it a
shot my names Cody and I'm a hunky dude
hunky dude hunky dude hunky dude okay dude you think about that well where's the portal
what, the portal I opened to your heart no no the one that supposed to bring
Santa Claus to us oh well well this is just a normal
ukelele I just I just wanted to know if you like this song(it seems like a oke Brooklyn Guy would make) yeah it was okay oh
How's it work?
Well, you just crank the old knob and then you turn that dial there.(what, where's the autopilot button, those words are foreign to me)
But you have to say what you want to bring here.
Okay. Its that simple?
Yep.
Okay. Um...
We want Santa Claus in this room right now.(machine: tough luck)
WHOA!
What's going on here?
Where am I?
Oh, hey, Santa. I'll tell you what's going on. You better take these hands!
(punches Santa)
TAKE THAT, SANTA!
Jeffy! You knocked down Santa Claus!
Yeah. Why'd you do that?
Because he didn't gave me any toys for Christmas!
HO, HO, OH NO.
Why'd you do that?
Because you gave me no toys for Christmas!
What? No toys? Hold on. (grunts) The only reason you were getting no toy is if you weren't on the naughty list. Let me check. So what was your name little boy? My name is Jeffy. See it says it on my shirt Jef-fy. Hmm, Jeffy. Yes. LOOK, YOUR NAME IS RIGHT HERE!
*Santa hit Jeffy with the book and runs away*(FINALLY, HE GOT WHAT HE HAD COMING)
JUNIOR! CODY! STOP HIM!
Jeffy punch Santa in the face (1st try and that's what I'll do to YouTube for age-restricting SML)
Let me go, kids! you go until you give me talk I can't
give toys to kids are naughty I'm never gonna let you go channel listen I'll
Jeffy punch Santa in the face (2nd try)
then I made the rope it fit tight this time listen I will run again I swear if
you let me go Sam I'm never letting you go after what
you did dang just let me get my toilet back and I'll give you whatever to you
you the saddest promise and I don't think he'd run again so yeah I'd let him
go all right yeah how these gonna write again you can
imagine but but it's empty because I could reach all the toilets on the North
Pole wait wait is it so that bag takes you to the North Pole huh oh good mrs.
Jeffy he's trying to escape to the North Pole! Get him! Jeffy:STOP HIM!
*Dramatic Music and a fat man running down the stairs*
I think I'm free!!! *OOF*
*Hits the door*
movie go floor we're not falling for that against Santa you keep trying to
escape yeah Santa why is it so hard to give
Jeffy just one toy because he's naughty no granite windows oh my into the door
just to keep him shut up hello Merry Christmas
Oh cops what are you doing here oh yeah we got a call from the North Pole saying
that Santa had called them and told them that he had been kidnapped kidnapped
kidnapped yeah yeah we take calls from the North Pole pretty seriously so I'm
gonna have to come in and look around even though I don't have a warrant uh
but Santa Claus is definitely not here so why would you want to come in yeah
but I still have to search so okay now where is it Santa know if the robot toy
that I got for Christmas oh that's awesome huh what is that thing
oh that's my snow glow well what was it uh your mom cuz she's fat my mom uh-huh
really really you're gonna do that you're gonna call my mom fat what is it
what does it matter where you just insult my mother I'm in your ex-wife oh
man all right if you see Santa you just give me a call okay okay will do doll
with all that noise we almost got caught sorry junior we were trying to keep him
quiet well I thought Jeff he tried to keep quiet if I hit him in the head what
were you doing I was hitting him in the head mm-hmm
you're doing a bad job at it mm-hmm oh boy toy boy well yeah well what are we
gonna do all you're gonna get them toys or not listen I'll give you one toy if
you give me milk and cookies what milk and cookies I mean I don't know if we
should trust them he keeps trying to run off and stuff but all right Cody how
about you go get the milk and cookies and we'll stay here with them okay
there's a good boy no Santa white blanket oh that guy's not right now Jeff
you want to say I hate you so much oh god guys what Cody
I think Santa's choking what yeah what we do Jimmy you just saved
Santa's life citizens live yeah you saved my life
give me toys maybe not so nerdy after all give me joy you do what I will give
you toys Chucky you're gonna get a toy for saving his life
right okay I've decided to give all three of you the toy yeah turn around
close the tent and then when you turn back around
you'll have your toy oh he left oh yeah I stopped going I wasn't
And... Go!
One... Two... Three... Four... Five... Six... Seven... Eight... Nine... Ten!
We're not toys! (Stupid Santa Claus)
Wha?
Are You What?! What? HE LEFT?!?!?!?! is
expecting that oh boy oh boy chasing me there you know he's already at the North Pole. I didn't get anything for Christmas that's sucks!
Jessie yeah I just really wanted touring yeah everybody deserves a toy on
Christmas except for me
yeah except for you jr. I mean hey Jeffy you want to have my my
really cool super cool robot toy for Christmas
yeah you can have that oh thank you
Christmas should be about giving yeah I mean I did feel really good but well why
don't we just bring Santa back with this thing oh it's all that a juice Junior
it's not gonna work oh but is there something you want to
give me um you know like anything is just no now is there anything you can
oof
THAT GOD DAMN CAT PIANO!!!!!!! I HATE THAT PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!